ONEderland!

Even though temps have been unseasonably warm so far this December, I am truly experiencing a Winter ONEderland. Yes, that "typo" is intentional. After my monthly visit to Dr. V this past Friday, I am officially out of the 200lbs and into the, more socially acceptable & healthy, 100lbs. Yay! This is so exciting for me on many levels. Firstly, I can't remember the last time the number staring back at me on the scale started with anything other than a "2". Really, it's been YEARS. Secondly, there is that much less weight for my 5'2" frame to be carrying around, which is so much better for my heart and bones. I am only 6 points away from being just run-of-the-mill "Overweight" on the BMI scale!

My Thanksgiving holiday was quite splendid this year. Went home, like usual, from Wednesday to Saturday. For the first time in many years, John was with me the whole time. My brother, sister and I (with John's help) cooked the entire Thanksgiving meal, and were only a little over an hour late serving! Ha ha We rocked the meal, and a good time was had by all. Once relatives and friends went home on Thanksgiving, the four of us played an enjoyable game of Scrabble together and watched a movie. The time home with mom was perfect! Sunday, John and I made Thanksgiving dinner for his family, which was also delectable and enjoyable.

I have been trying to get into the Christmas spirit, immersing myself in Christmas cheer... listening to Christmas music, writing out Christmas cards, and anxious to decorate. John and I also walked over to our town's tree lighting this past Sunday. It was great, and there was even free hot cocoa! I'm really looking forward to our Leyden Family Christmas party this upcoming Sunday. Can't wait to spend the time with family I hardly get to see.

Hope everyone is enjoying their holiday season thus far! I'll be back soon...

Updated pic of me over Thanksgiving weekend (11/25/2011):

NSV & Nonsense

Guess I should start off by clarifying the meaning of NSV, for those of you unfamiliar with weight-loss lingo. It simply stands for Non-Scale Victory! This is basically anything that provides positive feedback for you in regards to "weight-loss", other than the number on the scale. For example, your clothes no longer fitting you because they're too big, fitting into smaller-sized clothes, being able to climb a flight of stairs without getting winded, getting compliments from people, etc.

So, yesterday I had my annual physical... After the usual weigh-in, BP reading, etc., my doctor looked over my blood work, comparing it to last year's, and told me I had "wins" across the board! :) Here are my numbers this year, compared to last year...

Cholesterol (overall): 2010 = 229 / 2011 = 172 (57pt diff)
LDL (the bad stuff): 2010 = 138 / 2011 = 94 (44pt diff)
HDL (the good stuff): 2010 = 37 / 2011 = 42 (5pt diff Can still use improvement here, but better!)
Triglycerides: 2010 = 269 / 2011 = 178 (91pt diff!) 
And even though I never had a sugar problem (thank the Goddess), my glucose went from 86 in 2010 down to 73 this year.

As you can imagine, I am very happy about this bit of information!

And now a rant... I shouldn't get so upset, and expect it by now, but every year I am still unnerved about the premature exposure to all things Christmas. November 1st I had the unfortunate experience of not only seeing a house decorated and lit up, but also a large blow up reindeer planted in the middle of their front yard. Come on people! Let Halloween go out in style, and maybe even get through Thanksgiving first. Stores are already playing Christmas music. Ugh! Don't get me wrong, I love all things Christmas, but all in due time. I was raised with the belief that the Christmas season officially began when Santa (the real one) came in on the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade. And believe me, from the day after Thanksgiving through Christmas Day I listen to nothing but Christmas music, and enjoy those special Christmas movies. But not a moment sooner. And I hate the fact that it's shoved down my throat everywhere I go before then! I understand if you want to take advantage of warmer weather to decorate your house with lights. Really, I get that. Especially for older folks. But, there is no need to plug the cord in and light them up before Thanksgiving! And, going back to the blow-up decorations... I am just not a fan of those at all!!! For any holiday. They're huge, obnoxious, and use entirely too much energy. Sorry if I've offended anyone here... these are merely my opinions. 


Okay. Got that off my chest! A few side notes...


Horrible Bosses and The Change Up are funny movies, if you're in the mood for a decent comedy. I recommend. 


This weekend I'm going to PA to visit my best friends and "nephews". Kristen and I will also be continuing our tradition of going to see the new Twilight movie! Can't wait!


My sister was promoted to Shift Manager at Starbucks. She is very happy about this, and I couldn't be prouder! :) She deserves it!


Mom has completed 2 of her 6 chemo treatments, and thankfully still feels well. 


Well, Tracey should be here soon (at SBX), so I'll sign-off for now. Until next time...

Aftershock

Time is an illusion… Eons have gone by, yet it feels like a mere blink of the eye. When looking back at the last blog entry I posted, I was joking about the earthquake we experienced. Little did I know I would soon be experiencing my own personal tremors, that would shake me to the core. Ironic. 

Mid-August my mother was told she had fibroids. Soon after it was discovered she had a tumor instead. She had surgery on September 14^th, where it was actually discovered she has an aggressive stage 3C Ovarian Cancer. It spread. They were able to remove any visible tumors, however she has now just began a rigorous course of chemo. Things have been rough, emotionally, to say the least, but I do my best to remain positive and be strong everyday! Especially for her. My mother is not only that, but my best friend, my strength and the love of my life. She has loved me unconditionally from day one. I have to have faith that she will be okay.

That being said, we all know how much harder it is to stay on track with eating healthy and losing weight when there is added stress in our lives. I have never been so grateful to have the Band, as I have been now! My mind is still the same, and there are days where I feel so stressed I feel as if I could eat the whole house, much like Hansel & Gretel. Thankfully, where as in the past I most likely would have binged my way through the contents of my kitchen, I am unable to do so. The restriction the Band provides me with has been enough of a support tool, that I have actually still been able to lose weight during this tumultuous time. I’ve also decided I would like to make my body as cancer-hostile as possible, and am beginning to incorporate an even healthier diet into my life, trying to eat as “clean” as possible. This basically means that I am gradually reducing/cutting out white flour, sugars and any processed foods, including opting for meats that are organic and hormone-free. Some substitutions I’ve found that are great when it comes to baking are agave nectar and almond meal! I’ve also learned that incorporating endive & onions daily, as well as sea bass weekly, will help keep cancer away. Who knows if that fact will change one day (it seems those kinds of things often do)? I haven’t been able to do that, but hey, worth a shot I guess.

I’ve been feeling a multitude of emotions over these past couple months, but mainly the drive to live my life to the fullest has been at the forefront. This has raised questions like, “What do I want to do with my life?” “Where do I see myself in 5 years?”, etc. While I don’t have all the answers just yet, I do know that I’m torn between two loves… Psychology (going back to school for my Master’s or Doctorate’s and doing clinical work with adolescents) and Culinary (maybe taking a business course or two, and opening up a small bakery/café/luncheonette type place, specializing in good-for-you, wholesome food). What to do, what to do? Lol

For now I’m just taking each day as it comes and trying to at least to do one thing I love everyday!

Had my monthly visit at the NJLA office today! Lost 1lb (which I’m very okay with), so Dr. Silvestri added a “drop” to my Band. All together, I’ve lost a total of 56lbs since the surgery! (that brings my BMI down to 36.7, and completely out of the “Morbidly Obese” category. Yay!) Amazing. It still shocks me when I look at a new picture taken, or catch a glimpse of my reflection in a store window. Who is that girl? Is that really me? And, as it turns out, yes, it really is! I still have a long way to go, but at this moment in my journey I am feeling stronger than ever! I have so much energy and strength, and my self-confidence has sky-rocketed (even though I’m still struggling here, I know it’s a slow process, but I am a work-in-progress, and will continue to grow each day.)!

Thank you for everyone who’s been there beside me along this journey at any given point! I couldn’t have made it here, where I am today, without the support of all of you. You have each blessed my life in some way, and I will always be grateful!

May you be well, and remember to live your life to the fullest, the best you can… Carpe Diem!

Seismic

So, the east coast was shaken awake yesterday afternoon. Mother Nature thought we could use a little jolt. All I have to say is, "Dear West Coast... please keep your tremors to yourself. We're good with the hurricanes and flooding. Thanks. Your loving sibling, East Coast." The funny thing is, everyone was in such a tizzy, and it wasn't even catastrophic (Thank the Goddess!). You know Californians are mocking the hell out of us. LOL My brother was telling me that they were joking about the rate at which news spreads on the internet these days, thanks to Twitter and Facebook, saying that word of the quake was outrunning the quake itself, and people were hearing about it before they were feeling it. Crazy! We had CNN on during dinner last night and heard the anchor say, "After today's dramatic events..." Nick and I looked at each other in disbelief (thinking they were talking about the earlier tremble), then we realized they were talking about Libya... Ok. REAL news! Ha ha

Since the cocktail party, I seem to have shrunk some more. Not in LBs, but literally in clothing. Good thing I'm going back to work and have a new part-time job, because I am very close to needing all new clothes. Got rid of two more pairs of pants that are too big, and will go through my shirts tonight. One of my blue shirts (that I still need for work) is immense, and where my bosom once filled it to capacity, the material now drapes incredibly loose. I'm not complaining... it's definitely a good feeling! And, even though I still have quite a way to go, for the first time in a long time I am actually feeling comfortable in my own skin. Since the difference is measurably noticeable, I thought it was time to create a Before/After photo to post...

Me w/ my cousin, Kevin (LEFT taken 1/1/2011; RIGHT taken 8/7/2011)

This has been a busy week for me... started my new part-time job at Sears, so I've been working every day (yay!). Monday night went to the Studio at Webster Hall to see Julia Nunes play with my brother. Last night, my siblings and I had dinner at Abuela's. Tonight is catch-up. Tomorrow, spending the day with my mom and family dinner at night. Close the store on Friday night. Then Saturday picnic and heading upstate to spend the night at mom's and go to Wine Festival at Bethelwoods on Sunday. 

Oh, mentioning the picnic reminds me to tell you a little about a new project I'm co-working on. Some of us NJLA patients have been talking about getting together our own group of WLS survivors for extra support along this journey. We came up with a name (Twisted Banditz), Dan created a FB group page, I am working on designing an emblem/logo for the group (will post pic when done), and Alan came up with an idea to have a picnic in the park, which will be our kick-off event, to be held this Saturday! We've already had a great response and by the end of the day had almost 30 members join the group! The idea is to provide a healthy forum for extra support amongst our community, and share knowledge based on each of our strengths and accomplishments. We'll see where it goes, but for now it's just a fun project. Dan even ordered a ton of those rubber bracelets. lol

Well, that's all for now, folks! Hope you've been enjoying the splendid weather we've been blessed with these past few days, here in northern NJ.

Celebration of Life

Today marks 190 days since my surgery! And on day 186 I celebrated with many other WLS patients, as well as the staff from Dr. V's office! The annual Celebration of Life cocktail party for patients took place this last Saturday evening at The Assembly in Englewood Cliffs, NJ. It was a blast for sure! Top Night!

Last year I went w/ John as his date. I remember dreading dress-shopping, and procrastinated as long as possible. I finally found a decent, comfortable dress, but did not feel all that stunning. This year was the complete opposite! I actually didn't need to buy a dress, had the perfect little black dress and contrary to the previous year, felt confident and sexy. I fashioned my hair w/ a small white flower clip, securing some of the hair up on the right side of my face, leaving just a few wisps to frame my face. I couldn't wait to show up sparkling, flirty and dressed in my brand new perspective! My friend, and fellow WLS companion, Dan, was the first person I saw... he smiled and said, "Look at you, ready for the prom!" Having never had the pleasure, or misfortune, of having a high school prom, I felt a sort of inner-pleasure. This was my night. And truly they picked the perfect title for this soiree!

I enjoyed the evening by catching up w/ friends I've made along this journey, quality time w/ my siblings (who came as our "dates"), saving my daily caloric intake for several Dewar's & Diet Cokes (ha ha) and laughing, dancing my ass off w/ the NJLA staff (John's friends from work, who have become like a 2nd family to me)!

In a world where having a college degree doesn't necessarily mean you have a job, and relationships change like daily menu specials, it's nice to feel secure about something. I am ever grateful for the positive turn around in my life, and know that I have made some sincere, wonderful friends (Dan, Alan... Nicole. and several others I'm just now meeting) along the way, and can count on them to be there with me every step of this journey... and beyond!

Here are some pictures from Saturday's event (8/13/2011):

With my wonderful siblings (Sarah & Nick)!

Dan, Alan & Nicole

NJLA Girls (from top-left): Maria, Giselly, Indira, Elizabeth, Me, Stella & Tammy)

The famous, Gaspar, Me, John & Elizabeth

Sistahs

Dan & I (near the end of the evening!)

On a Roll Again!

Apparently that last adjustment I had was the key! Gaspar, you're the best! All of a sudden the weight seems to literally be melting off me, and it's happening so fast. Went for a weigh-in last Friday, the 5th, just to see how I did in the 2 weeks post-adjustment, and... I lost 6lbs in that short time (42lbs total)! As a result, I have also lowered my BMI to below 40, therefore no longer classifying me as, the horrifying, "Morbidly Obese". I'm a happy girl! Slowly, but surely, I'm getting there, and feel great in the process. Really couldn't be happier about my health situation. Also, it seems those 6 little pounds have made a significant difference in my appearance, because everyone seems to be amazed at how much smaller I look and thinner my face is, even if it's only been a few weeks since they last saw me. 

Over the summer, the practice held three softball games, Patients vs. Staff. The staff won the first game, and patients the second, so Thomas (ED of the practice, and husband to Dr. V) declared that the winner of the third and final game would receive a prize. Of course, us patients kicked ass by a staggering 23-10! The prize was our choice... either a 3-month supply of vitamins, or a spa treatment. I opted for the spa treatment, which I happened to redeem after my weigh-in on Friday. So, feeling light and elated, I headed to the Glenpointe where I enjoyed a manicure, 30min facial and 30min massage. My first professional massage ever. It was divine, but not nearly long enough! And, for those of you wondering, I had a male masseuse... figured I might as well go big! Ha ha

Spent Saturday at the Bronx Zoo with Mauro, Claudia & her son, Andre. It was a lot of fun! They had this "Passport" excursion for children, that I played with Andre... we went all over the zoo getting the passports stamped and were able to fill them!

Watched Source Code the other day... it was pretty good. But, the movie I saw recently that I really loved was Limitless with Bradley Cooper (love that man!)... it was awesome!!! Highly recommend it. If you see it, let me know what you think. Anyone have any other movie recommendations for me?

Had a discussion with my friend last night about how the English language isn't what it used to be. Words used to be rich and saturated with lavishness. Now everything is "Yo" "Sup?" and "Um, like". When did we become so lazy and languid? I was thinking about how the Romeo & Juliet balcony scene might sound today... "Fuck, Romeo! Why the Hell do you have to be a fuckin' Montague? Dude! I mean, I guess it doesn't really matter, it's just a name. Coffee's still coffee whether you call it java, joe or what-have-you. Whatevs. Guess I could just give up my name? Fuck it! Let my parents try and stop me. I'm old enough to do what I want!" As opposed to the classic, "Romeo, Romeo. Wherefore art thou, Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse they name. Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I'll no longer be a Capulet...What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet, so Romeo would, were he not Romeo called." Oh well... what would a post be without a little side-rant from me, right? Ha ha Something to ponder...

Well, my sister's off her shift, so I'm going to go hang out with her. Have a lovely day... it's beautiful here!

Walking on the Moon

My current soundtrack as I write this long overdue blog entry. The lyrics of this Police song are actually kinda cool and fitting in a way. I'm sitting here at Starbucks... my sister was working all day, so I thought I'd hang here and get to see her too!

A lot has been going on in my personal life the past 2 months, and while I haven't really had the time to write, I've missed it dearly!

Post WLS, as of this past Friday, the 22nd, I have lost a total of 36lbs. That being said, since my last post about 2 months ago, I've only lost 5lbs. This is due to partly to my not finding the right adjustment yet, and heavy stress triggers. I'm okay with this though, because this is a life-long journey, and what's 2 months in comparison?

I am learning to recognize the difference between true hunger and stress eating. I'm also becoming more attuned to my body and how I handle stress. Believe it or not, sometimes I don't even realize that I'm stressed out... it takes someone else to point it out to me. Then it's like, "Duh, Val!"

Here are some of my life updates (some of the stress is GOOD stuff), in no apparent order...

LIFE/RELATIONSHIPS
Remember way back when, I mentioned that great things were happening in my life and I would tell you about them soon enough?!? Well, sorry for the major delay, but basically... I'm engaged! That's right folks, ring-on-finger, date-set, location almost picked, engaged. Some of you reading this may already know this news. Let me assure those of you who had no idea and are surprised... it shocked the Hell outta me too! Oh, it's John, by the way! Without posting my complete personal life here, basically, John and I had been in a relationship for 9 years (yep... you read correctly... 9, as in almost a decade) together. We broke up, and have been apart for the past 2 years. March 1st, while talking about pretty much everything, John (out of nowhere) got down on his knee and said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. Three weeks later, while visiting Kristen & Scott, he once again got down on one knee and proposed for a second time... this time with a ring. It was a very fulfilling moment for me, and the vintage-style ring is absolutely perfect!

As of June 1st, we've been living together (once again) in our new apartment! It was a mad dash trying to find one, but all worked out, and while the apartment is considerably small, it's really nice and in a quiet neighborhood. We like!

My soon-to-be Mother-in-Law (MIL) was in Colombia when all of this went down, and had no apartment when she returned, Soooo... she has been living with us! Yay! Ha Ha Nah, it hasn't been that bad, and is actually quite manageable. Knowing it's temporary is helpful, and having her there has actually proven quite advantageous. Which brings me to the next topic...

WORK
My position at Oasis runs from September through June, leaving me out of work, and out of an income for the summer! This is probably the most stressful factor in my life right now. I started really focusing all my time on job searching and sending out resumes near the end of June. I have yet to hear back from even one of those positions! I know it's hard out there, but do you have any idea what it's like to be 31 years old, have a college degree and plethora of qualifications, and somehow not be able to find a job?! I've been pretty much living on the few pennies I had, not able to pay all my bills, and really struggling these past few weeks. Any idea how damaging that can be to one's psyche? It's not pretty. That being said, I am doing my best to stay positive and hopeful, having faith that something will come along any minute! There is ONE prospect that seems somewhat hopeful... fingers crossed please everyone! :)

BAND/HEALTH
As I mentioned earlier, I haven't really been losing weight, but my body is changing and getting smaller. This is thanks to my re-introduction of the gym into my life! I've been going pretty regularly as many times as possible during the week, and have definitely noticed a difference, not only in the way I feel (strong, healthy), but in the way my clothes fit me! More and more items in my wardrobe are becoming obsolete. Shirts that I once "filled" and fit me snuggly, now hang loose. Pants that once couldn't close or gave me a muffin top, now need to be secured with a safety pin. Great non-scale measurements of success and self-confidence booster! Thank you Bally's! lol

That being said, I've still felt like I can eat more than I should be able to. That, combined with the fact that I'm a stress-eater (who isn't?!?), have been key in my number on the scale not budging. Well, that's not completely true... it did go up a few pounds during "that time of month", but I was able to shed those temporary pounds rather easily. So, after a month of trying to figure all these things out, I went for an adjustment. I was actually hesitant to go because I felt I was so close to filling my Band completely, and was afraid I would be the first person in history to have her Band filled to capacity and still be hungry! Gaspar saw me, looked at my chart, reassured me that my fear would not come to fruition, and said, "I think we just need to do this!" What he meant by that was adding a substantial amount of saline, as opposed to the 1/2CC's I'd been getting. He pulled out all the saline I had, to see exactly what was in there, and then added a full CC. John and I have actually been wondering if I was in fact too tight (for the first time!) since it's hard to get even liquids down sometimes. But, I've been adjusting better each day, and even though it's hard (especially first few bites), I am able to get food down and only the small portion that I should be eating. RESULT! :) (ha ha A little Coupling reference, for those of you who are familiar) I haven't been "throwing up", and as long as that's the case, I'm going to try and work with this adjustment.

MISCELLANEOUS
Finished watching all of Ghost Whisperer series awhile back! I liked. More recently I've made my way through The Office. Funny, funny show. We don't have cable, but do stream Netflix and Hulu Plus, so I've got plenty to keep me entertained.

Have been dreaming of opening my own cafe/bakery lately. Probably because I've got loads of free time on my hands these days! But, that's pretty much just a pipe dream. Need money for that! Would be nice though.

Another advantage to not working, which is also in conjunction with my sister working at Starbucks, is that I've enjoyed endless Iced Skim Lattes and lots of sissy-time so far this summer! :)

Ooh! I almost forgot one other measure of success... the other night I was getting ready to go to a party, and going through my jewelry. For the Hell of it, I decided to try on some rings that I haven't been able to wear in years! And they fit!!! Good feeling!

Also, I've lowered my BMI from a horrifying 47, to a slightly less horrifying 40.4 (as of Friday's weigh-in)!

And here are some more picture updates for your viewing pleasure!

Taken 5/5/2011 (at TWIN event, with Angelae):

Taken 7/17/2011:

Well, now that I've written a freakin' novel, I think I'll sign off for today. I'm actually waiting for my friend, Tracey to meet me! Oh, and here she is! :) Promise to be back soon! Have a great day!

Yay for Friday the 13th!

I don't know why everyone gets in such a tizzy every time the 13th falls on a Friday! Being born on the 13th, I consider it a lucky number for me. Not a curse. There are so many Friday the 13th superstitions, but they mostly come from some connection between religion and superstition. For instance:

On October 13, 1307, a day so infamous that Friday the 13th would become a synonym for ill fortune, officers of King Philip IV of France carried out mass arrests in a well-coordinated dawn raid that left several thousand Templars — knights, sergeants, priests, and serving brethren — in chains, charged with heresy, blasphemy, various obscenities, and homosexual practices. None of these charges was ever proven, even in France — and the Order was found innocent elsewhere — but in the seven years following the arrests, hundreds of Templars suffered excruciating tortures intended to force "confessions," and more than a hundred died under torture or were executed by burning at the stake.

Anyway, just thought I'd share some fun facts around Friday the 13th... Hope everyone is having a good day. I know I can't wait for next year, when my birthday falls on a Friday! :)

Now I'll fill you in on my Band journey...

Last Friday (after 3 weeks) I went to the office, gained 2lbs in that time, spoke w/ Dr. V, and she gave me a fill. Not sure how much, but I'm focusing more on the "feeling", and not on the amount of saline CCs that are in my Band. I told the doctor that I had been feeling hungry and sometimes the amount of food I am supposed to eat doesn't satisfy me, and I need a little more. Other times it's fine. She said I need an adjustment, but to also cut back on carbs, limiting them to once a day, if at all.

I felt pretty good after the adjustment, however this past week I have not felt much of a difference. I have been more cognizant of my carb intake, but still wasn't always feeling satisfied. Rather than wait for a few more weeks to by, where I could potentially gain more weight, I decided to see Dr. V today to let her know what was going on. Turns out I lost those 2lbs in the one week since my last visit. Yay! She still gave me an adjustment though, and said I did the right thing by not waiting.

So, I'm still in search of MY sweet spot, but loving life along the way! :)

P.S. Happy belated Mother's Day to all you mom's out there! I finally got to see my mom last night and it was wonderful! Nick, Sarah & I met her for dinner at this charming restaurant in Goshen, NY called Limoncello. If you're ever in the area, I highly recommend it. It was the first time we ever went there, the service was great, the food delicious and made from all fresh ingredients (including homemade pasta), food was also affordable and we were even given limoncello shots and coffee on the house!

Photo Update

I know I posted some "before" pictures awhile back, but some of you, who I haven't seen, have been asking to see some recent "after" pics.

And so, without further ado, here you are...

Taken 3/26/2011 (w/ my "nephew", Ryan):

Taken 4/22/2011 (cheesy self-shot):

Taken 4/22/2011 (before the Lady Gaga concert):

Time Flies!

Has it really been 17 days since my last post?! Plus, looking back, I realized I haven't updated you on the Band WL progress since back in March. Yikes! My apologies for being such a slacker. I've been so busy lately, looking for a job (will be out of work in about 2 months) and looking for an apartment (need to move out by June 1st), among other things, that one day just blurs into the next and here we are!

Let's talk Band. Last I mentioned, I was sick and had a teeny bit of saline removed, losing 4lbs in those few days since the adjustment. Well, a few days later I went to have that amount of saline put back in and had gained 3lbs. So, basically, I lost 1lb that week. Which is normal at this point in the game. I should be losing no more than 1-2lbs per week. Had my next appointment on April 17th, and lost those 3lbs, bringing my total WL back up to 31lbs! Yippee! Gaspar added another 1cc of saline to help w/ the hunger.

Since then, I've been feeling pretty good. I think I'm feeling the right amount of restriction, and I haven't really had any issues w/ food either. Dry chicken seems to be my biggest nemesis, but as long as I take small bites and chew enough, I'm usually OK.

I've also starting incorporating some Zumba workouts into my schedule. Not everyday, but a few times per week. Would really like to get back into the gym routine! Just need to find that motivation! I know, I know... don't we all?

Threw a surprise 30th birthday party for John, which was a huge success! He had no idea and a good time was had by all.

I spent Easter in PA w/ my family, visiting my Nana, and Palm Sunday w/ my family at my Auntie "I's" house. Overall the holiday was lovely and I thoroughly enjoyed the time w/ my family!

This weekend I'm making another trek out to PA (a little further this time), for the twins' Baptism. Angelae was able to get us a great deal on a hotel, so we're fortunate enough to go the night before. Times are pretty tight financially right now and I thought we were going to have to do the whole drive in one day.

Well, that's about all for now. Will post again shortly w/ some recent photos! :)

The Human Experience

Shocker, I know... 2 posts in one day, back-to-back! Ha ha

I just had something else to share w/ you all. At the recommendation of my brother, and then sister, I watched a documentary film entitled, The Human Experience. It is amazing and very touching. It's about 2 brothers who head out in search of, well, "the human experience", stepping in the shoes of those less fortunate than most. From living homeless on the streets of New York City, to helping sick children in Peru, to bonding w/ a leper community in Ghana, they share their experience for all to see.

I highly recommend watching this film, and challenge you to not be effected by it. What purpose do we have here on this earth, and how can we make a difference? Rent it, or stream it on Netflix as soon as you are able to. Just make sure you have some tissues nearby.

Two thumbs, way, way up there!

Self-Esteem and Attraction

So, I've been thinking about the correlation of self-esteem and attraction a lot lately. Are we attracted to someone based solely on their appearance, or is it something more that pulls us toward them? Perhaps an amazing personality, or incredible sense of humor? They say looks are only skin deep, but how well do we practice this concept?

The reason this has been on my mind lately is because I have noticed a difference in how I am treated by strangers, in particular the male gender. I know I have lost some weight, but I am still the same person I always was, and still overweight. Yet, I've noticed that I'm being approached by more men and it seems all of a sudden more guys are interested. I was talking w/ a friend about this. Where were all these guys before, when I was actually looking for someone? I haven't changed that drastically physically. So what is it? And then she said the simplest thing... "It's because you feel more self-confident about yourself." Could that really be the answer? Does it all come down to your level of self-confidence?

When a guy notices a woman, sure he notices her physical appearance first, but there might actually be more to what attracts him to her. If a woman has low self-esteem, it will show in her little mannerisms... head down, hair in face, constant fidgeting and probably not very good w/ eye contact. Is this a turn-off for men, no matter how gorgeous she may be? Do men really want a woman who is, not cocky and self-absorbed, but rather comfortable in her own skin? A woman who embraces her flaws and realizes her own beauty and true worth?

Is there really a correlation between self-esteem and attraction from others? I don't know... just something to ponder.

Hodge-Podge

Visit w/ the Gramlings was awesome! It was so good to see them and play w/ the twins. Who, by the way, are the sweetest little things ever. Ryan is crawling all over the place and Lucas has 2 teeth! They're such happy babies and you can't help but melt when in their presence. Only bummer was the time flew, and the weekend went by too quickly. I also got to see my Nana, as we stopped there on the way back from Kristen's, so that was nice, and also made her day.

My new adjustment was going well. Unfortunately, I came down w/ some food poisoning yesterday, and they released a 1/2cc of saline from my band since I was dry-heaving. However, I lost another 4lbs since Friday (31lbs lost total!), so that is a good indication that the adjustment was at a good point for me. We'll see how I do w/ the slightly less amount. I have a good feeling though.

While I was home sick yesterday, I got to finish watching season 3 of Ghost Whisperer. Yes, I'm still plugging away at watching the whole series. It's just so damn addicting! I got a preview DVD of Black Swan and am hoping to be able to watch it over the weekend. I've heard such great things about it.

My birthday is in a little less than 2 weeks. Can't believe I'm going to be 31 years old. I still feel like I'm 26! Not sure yet how I'll celebrate, but definitely looking forward to it. I love birthdays!

Tonight I met my friend, Meagan, for dinner to catch up. It was a wonderful evening and so good to see her. :) I also got to catch up on Grey's Anatomy tonight. Well, almost... I now have to watch tonight's episode that aired, since I missed it. But, other than that I'm caught up and it's getting good again. High drama.

I have to say that a lot of great things are happening in my life (I will share full details soon enough), and I am truly very happy. Thank you everyone for your support, encouragement, and love. I wouldn't be here without you all in my corner.

P.S. I promise to post a recent pic soon!

"One" IS Significant

Sorry I haven't been posting as often as I would like, but I haven't had much time on the internet lately. I will continue to make more of an effort to come online to blog. I love it!

I stuck to my plan this past week, journaling my food consumption and being aware of what I was eating. I definitely felt like I was overeating and would feel hungry before I thought I should. I really thought I gained weight since my last appointment, but when I got on the scale today, I was happy to see that I lost one pound! I know it's only one pound in two weeks, but that pound was so precious and I was so grateful to see it go. More so because I was afraid I had gained weight. Phew!

Gaspar (the NP from NYU) saw me today and did my adjustment for me. We spoke for a bit, and basically, as I already knew, but am now actually living it, everyone is different. Some people only need one adjustment and they're good to go, while it may take others three, four or six adjustments before they find their "sweet spot" and are living in the "Green Zone". Gaspar said he went a little easy on me (since I told him about my stuck chicken today) and gave me an extra 1.5cc's of saline. I am grateful for this since I am going away to western PA to visit Kristen, Scott and the boys, and won't have access to the doctors should I find myself too tight. For dinner I had some broccoli cheddar soup from Panera's (didn't feel like cooking), took my time, was able to get it down and felt satisfied after about 5oz. This is good. Once I start eating some solids, I'll be able to feel the restriction and know better where I stand.

Well, I'm off to bed. Have to get up early for my road trip tomorrow. Yay!

Yay... Warmth!

Could it be? Spring is finally here? No more snow? It is deliciously warm outside, and the sun is shining bright today, which always helps one's mood. :)

Today is one week since my first fill. I've been doing pretty well, able to eat and not feeling hungry. I am noticing, however, that at times, I need to eat a little more than 4-5oz of food to feel satisfied. Hence, I feel like I'm "overeating". Now, obviously the sense of the word has a completely different meaning than before Weight Loss Surgery (WLS). Before, when I "overate", it meant, that I consumed enough food for two people, and felt like I was going to explode. Now, after WLS, I never eat to the point of explosion, and "overeating" simply means I might eat 6-8oz of food instead of 4-5oz. Not the end of the world, but not the most optimal for maximum effectiveness of the Band.

So, here's my plan... my next appointment is next Friday, the 25th. I will just wait and see, not only the scale results, but find out what the doctor thinks, at that time. That will be 2 weeks after the adjustment. In the meantime, I will keep noting when I feel hungry and pay attention to the amount of food I am consuming. I am trying very hard to be cognizant of all factors while eating...

• what I'm eating (protein, veg, complex carb, etc); 
• the amount of time it takes me to eat (putting fork down after each bite and taking a long breath helps slow things down);
• making sure food is well chewed, and bite not too big; and
• how much food I am actually eating! (measuring out beforehand helps a lot)

We'll see how things go next week.

Tomorrow I'm going w/ my family to a few wineries in western Jersey to celebrate my aunt's birthday. Looking forward to the family time! Then tomorrow night, I am going bowling w/ several other WLS patients from NJLA. I am really looking forward to this! I get to meet other people who are going through the same things I am, in a fun and active setting. Who doesn't love to bowl, right?!?

Well, I'm off to enjoy the rest of this gorgeous day. Think I'll get my car washed! Soak up the sun, people, soak it up!

First Fill

Hi All... Got my first adjustment on Friday, the 11th. So far, so good. They recommend you go on a liquid and soft food diet for the first two days after, to help you adjust. I've had no problems w/ any of the foods I've tried so far, which is good. Then again, I am being extra careful, taking small bites, chewing the hell out of the food and eating super slow. Don't want anything getting stuck!

I am just about fully recovered from the strep, which is wonderful.

It's really amazing how my life has changed so much since the surgery. They tell you that the surgery changes you, and you start seeing the world through different eyes. I thought I was prepared for this. I am now realizing that I was not completely prepared. However, I am taking things as they come and slowly learning to accept myself and the circumstances around me. If something good is happening, embrace it! Don't question it. That is the new philosophy I am trying to live by. We'll see.

Today was a nice surprise... my school district was closed due to flooding! I did go in for a little bit though to help serve lunch, since the building was still open. But, I only had to go in for a few hours. No complaints here! :) Let's see if tomorrow's the same!

If the Sweater Fits!

Quick post, because I don't have much time, but am excited to share some non-scale successes with you all!

Last summer I bought a very classic, cute white dress w/ stylish black polka dots for a cocktail party. However, the dress was quite snug, and I felt like a stuffed sausage, so I opted w/ another, more comfortable dress instead. I again tried the polka dress on for Halloween. It was even tighter and I felt like I couldn't breathe. Back on the hanger and into the closet it went. Then yesterday I had the notion to give it another go, since I have lost a good amount of weight. And wouldn't you know... that sucker zipped right up, no sucking in on my part, and was actually LOOSE on me! Even in the bust area (Gasp! I know! haha). It was one of the most amazing feelings ever. Like a natural high.

This then inspired me to try on a few more items that were stored away at the bottom of my drawers. And low and behold... they fit! Today, I am wearing a beautiful sweater that I have not worn in TWO years, because it's fitted and every time I put it on reminded me of how heavy I had become, because it would emphasize everything. Not today though. It fits me perfectly, and I actually got several comments at work at how great I look and to keep doing what I'm doing. Someone even told me I had a cute little "cinched" waist! Seriously?! How uplifting to hear!

I know I still have a long way to go, but I will take these little victories any day, any time! :) Happy Monday, All!

Strep, Agh!

Sorry again for the lag in posts. This time it's due to the evil monster, Strep Throat, who came to visit me Thursday afternoon, and decided to stick around for awhile. I finally went to the hospital yesterday, where they gave a miracle shot of steroids (my throat was that bad and fever 102.8), a bunch of meds and started me on antibiotics. When I tell you that after an hour I already started feeling better, it was amazing. AND I was in and out of Holy Name ER faster than I would've at Emergimed. Unbelievable. While my throat is still kind of sore today, the swelling has reduced immensely and I am on my way to full recovery!

So, now let me rewind a bit. Introducing solids back into my diet has been going pretty well so far. I have found that chicken breast can be a little troublesome as well as broccoli stems (which I'm not all that committed to anyway, ha ha). They (some people at the practice) are thinking I might not need many adjustments at all, if I'm already finding resistance without a fill. This is a good thing, I think.

And speaking of adjustments... I am definitely ready for mine. I've been measuring out my 4oz of food, and I am now at the point where I could eat more than that. I know you're all thinking, "Seriously? 4oz of food? Anyone can eat more than that, unless you're a bird!" But, that's all I should need to feel full and satisfied. And so, since I am able to eat more, and feel hungry sooner than I should, it means it's time. Today was supposed to be my appointment for my very first adjustment. Exciting isn't it?! Well, thanks to the Strep Throat, I now I have to wait until I am completely better before getting adjusted. Which, is okay with me. My health is always my number one motivating factor in this journey, and that's what this decision is about. Since I was heaving overnight on Thursday, they had me go into the office on Friday just to make sure it wasn't the Band causing any issues. Dr. V told me to drink lots of fluids, get better and wait until I was completely well again before getting adjusted. Oh, but while I was there, I got weighed (this is something they do every time you go) and to my great surprise, I lost another 7lbs! Making my total weight loss thus far (well, minus what I lost from not eating Friday and Saturday) 24lbs in less than a month! Amazing. I'm going to stick w/ this 1lb/week weight loss goal, so that anything extra feels extra good. :)

On a side note... I'm putting my job searching efforts back into full effect. Especially after my lovely little germ-breeders have infected me once again. If you know of anything, I would be so grateful for the information or heads-up.

Hope everyone is well and staying healthy... be careful out there, everyone's getting sick! Have a great week!

Enter, Solids

My first attempt at solids (Laughing Cow spreadable garlic & herb cheese, on slice of Tuscan bread, grilled) was a success! Next was a small slice of my brother's homemade veggie pizza. Also a success! Sunday was another successful day. Please note, I am being extra careful and chewing my food like 25 times before I dare to swallow it. LOL

Today I had leftovers from my Aunt's dinner last night, and had a little trouble getting the pasta and/or pork loin down. It wasn't a big issue, I just had to wait a few moments for it to pass, and it wasn't even completely stuck. The thing that stinks is, I get very thirsty while I'm eating, but since I can't drink and eat at the same time... well, this is an adjustment for me, for sure.

Saturday night I went out w/ my siblings and friends to celebrate my sister's 22nd birthday. I wanted something cold to drink, but am still afraid to try carbonation, so that ruled out beer. I instead went w/ Stoli O and Cranberry. The first bar we went to, DCs, served me my drink in a nostalgic old-fashioned Ball jar... it was a little more than 12oz. Not only was the drink quite delicious, it "magically" took effect as if I had drank 4 of them! This is going to save me OODLES of money when it comes to libations. ;)

Hope everyone stayed dry today. I hope the rest of the week is sunny, as it purports to be, w/ a few warm days in the mix too. Have a great week!

What a Week!

Sorry folks... I know I've been MIA for awhile. All is well, the days just blurred into one another and before I knew it a week had gone by.

We last left off w/ my stellar post-op appointment last week, when I got the go-ahead to switch to soft foods. That has been going well. I am enjoying eating salmon, tuna, eggs and I created this delicious chick pea dish that was still appealing once emulsified! :) Yum.

I have, however, officially discovered what it feels like to be "stuck" (when food is not able to pass through the stoma and literally gets stuck). I gotta tell ya, not so fun. My first incident happened on Monday. Totally my fault. I decided it would be okay for me to have a couple of, what I thought to be, soft hors d'oeuvres. I should not have attempted this, as my instructions are soft, mushy foods. Well, they got "stuck", and it felt like this tight feeling in my chest. So, what would be your first instinct to do? Drink something to wash it down, right? Yeah, that was my instinct too. Problem is, when you have the Band, this concept does not work. What happened? Since the water could not go down, past the food, it came right back up. I was like one of those spouting water fountains. Ha ha Eventually the food went down, all was well and I learned my lesson. Thank Goddess I didn't throw up. The other incident happened last night. I had part of an omelet left over from dinner (eggs are OK). I must've taken too big a bite, or not chewed well enough. It got stuck. I tried jumping up and down to get it to pass, but in the end just had to wait it out. Again, grateful I didn't throw up.

Now, I begin incorporating solids back into my diet. Happy day! However, I will be proceeding w/ caution. This is good though, because I am starting to feel hungry again, and can eat more than 4oz sometimes. Looks like I will be needing a little fill when I go for my first adjustment on the 6th. I'm sticking to portions though. 

I also discovered that I really do, no longer have a tolerance for alcohol. After 2 shots of tequila Saturday night I was completely drunk. Going forward, I'm going to be quite the cheap date! Ha ha

This past Sunday I got see my cousins from Indiana who I never get to see, and meet my cousin's little baby, who is adorable, by the way. It was a great day!

Lots of surprising things are already happening in my life, but I'm not ready to get into that just yet. It just feels surreal that all I did at this point was have the surgery, and my life has become a whirlwind of options and new opportunities. Is it because of the surgery, or is it in my mind? Is it just that I feel more confident? Let's see what will unfold.

I've already started using cocoa butter like crazy, in the attempt to reduce any scarring from the surgery to none. *fingers crossed*

Promise to go back to regular postings. I've really missed my blog this past week! Hope everyone is well. Happy Friday!

Soft is Good (in this case)

Not only is the sun shining bright and the air deliciously warm, but I am on Cloud 9 right now for a few other reasons as well!

Today was my first post-op visit w/ Dr. V.

Good news #1: All my incisions are healing nicely, and everything looks good on that front (post-op-wise).
Good news #2: I got the OK to start the Soft Food Phase today!
Good news #3: I only have to stay in that phase for one week, and then I get to move on to the final phase of going back to solid foods for the following week. This will be followed by my very first adjustment!
Good news #4: I am ahead of the game w/ a total weight loss of 17lbs!!! (which means I'm doing excellent so far)

Everyone at the office was so proud of me and happy for me, that it made me feel extra happy myself! I stayed to have lunch w/ them and shared Sharon's soup and chicken salad w/ her. After about 1.5oz of soup and maybe an ounce of the chicken salad I was full! I was also drinking water though, which probably filled me too. I have to learn to drink 30min before eating and 30min after, not during. I can't tell you how good it felt to just be able chew something!

So, the Soft Food Phase works like so... I get three meals and two snacks. Each meal will total 4oz of food, and must contain at least 2oz of protein. Pureed chick pea or bean soups are good choices. The only foods that don't have to be pureed are eggs, fish, tofu or low-fat cheese. Everything else, veggies, fruits, other meats, etc. get emulsified (I can't wait to start using the Cuisinart emulsion blender my mom got me for Christmas!). As I mentioned earlier, I cannot drink whilst eating. This will take some adjusting for me. Oh, and I have to eat s-l-o-w-l-y... as in at least a half-hour for each "little" meal.

Gaspar (NP w/ the practice who is amazing w/ adjustments... he apparently has magic hands) explained to me, that the reason for switching to solid foods before my adjustment, is so that I will be better prepared for the change once I get that first fill ("fill" is another term used for adjustments, as they are literally filling the band w/ saline).

Even though I had a huge weight loss since the surgery, this is not the norm and my losses from here on in will be nowhere near that. Unlike the Gastric Bypass (Roux-en-Y), which is a restrictive AND malabsorptive procedure, Gastric Banding is purely restrictive. What does this mean? Well, w/ the Band, simply the amount of food you are able to eat is "restricted", but w/ the Bypass, not only is the amount of food limited, but, because your intestines are altered/re-routed, some of the nutrients and fats are not absorbed. That is why people who have the Bypass lose an immense amount of weight and FAST. The Band allows you to lose weight at a more steady pace. So, going forward, it's more normal that I will lose about 1-2lbs per week tops. Which, I personally believe, will prove to be more rewarding in the end, and is the better option for me.

Last night I realized that I am already feeling more confident and strong. I know this may sound silly because it's only been 11 days since surgery and I have a long way to go before reaching goal. But, I was thinking, it probably has to do w/ the simple fact that I had the surgery. I faced one of my BIGGEST fears... and survived. I can't tell you how amazing that, in and of itself, feels. I feel like I can do anything now. And I am ready for whatever comes next. The past 2 weeks haven't been easy, but every step so far has been worth it.

I am thoroughly enjoying this tuna for dinner! Protein shakes... see ya never! Ha ha (well, at least for the weekend)

Tummy Growl

As Temple of the Dog once sang, "I'm growing hungry." Not sure if I mentioned this in my post explaining the Lap-Band, but I won't actually get my first "adjustment" until I'm ready to go back to solid foods (about 5 weeks after the surgery). Right now there's only about 1cc of saline in my Band, just to flush the air out and make sure it works. Sooo... since my stomach/abdomen has been healing from the surgery, so has my appetite. And while I am getting plenty of protein in my diet, and the shakes are pretty satisfying, they are still liquid and I find myself feeling quite hungry throughout the day. I spoke w/ the nutritionist about this at my appointment yesterday. She said that usually means one is ready to move on to the next phase. When I go for my post-op on Friday, I plan to ask Dr. V if I can start the Soft Food Phase a couple of days early. The nutritionist said she is OK w/ that too! *fingers crossed*

In other news, I've still been sleeping on the couch, as it's been painful to lay down completely. Tonight I will attempt to sleep in my own bed again!

Each day at work has been a little better. This was a good week to go back, as we have off on Friday, as well as Monday, for President's Weekend. Too bad I'm not in one of those school districts who have all of next week off. But, I won't be greedy. :)

Thank you everyone for your continued support and words of encouragement! This is just the beginning of a long journey ahead... I can't tell you how much it means to me to have you there w/ me.

V-Day...

... is for suckers. Can you feel the quick rant coming on? lol... I cannot stand Valentine's Day, and here are the reasons why...

If you are in a relationship: There is so much pressure that you HAVE to do something for your significant other. And then anything you do costs three-times the amount it normally would, just because it's Valentine's Day. If you love someone, you shouldn't need a special day to "prove" it to them. Why don't you surprise them w/ flowers on a random Tuesday, just because, instead? And it's mostly focused on what the "guy" will buy/do for the "girl". How fair is that? It's a commercial holiday for all commercial business to advantage of the poor saps frantically running to the store after work, in fear of walking through the front door empty-handed (gasp!) to make money. And then of course...

If you are single: You're fucked. You suddenly find yourself on the receiving end of a million pity-smiles and sad faces. You're pathetic. "Poor So-and-So is all alone and has no one." You are constantly reminded, from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep, that you are, in fact, alone.

Thanks, Valentine's Day! You're swell. :)

That being said, I did get a couple of cute gifts from some of my students today. :)

OK, now that I've got that off my chest. Ha ha Today was my first day back to work, and boy was it exhausting! Not to mention HARD... Because today was Valentine's Day, I was surrounded by sweets and goodies and everything that is forebode. I was strong though and did not falter! I told everyone at work that I had to have my gallbladder removed along w/ the hiatal hernia. I just didn't want problems w/ them. I feel bad lying to some of the people there, but I just can't take chances. I was very surprised, however, to come home to a "Get Well" card from everyone at work. They didn't get me a bereavement card when my great-grandfather passed away, but they did for this. Maybe they don't completely hate me. lol

Tomorrow's my 1st post-op visit w/ the Nutritionist. We'll go over the next phase in the transition back to solids... the "soft food" phase. I am actually quite eager to start this phase, because I will be allowed to eat actual food!

In all seriousness...

Happy Valentine's Day!

to all my faithful readers (which probably isn't many). I love you all.

Back at Home

Well, I packed up my life at my recovery base, and came back home this afternoon. I didn't realize how much stuff I actually had over there... I really moved in for the week! lol Sarah's been home since I got back. We've already watched 2 movies together. It's nice to have some time alone w/ my sissy. We saw The Romantics (which I really like a lot, and loved the music even more! Can't find the soundtrack online anywhere though... Can anyone help me?) and Going the Distance (also good and kinda funny).

I'm in a lot less pain today! Yesterday, was kind of a bad day. My throat felt raw, the whole right side of my abdomen was in pain and, unfortunately, constipation found me. Sorry, but that's just how it was. I was also feeling hungry. Friday night, around 11pm, I felt hungry for the first time, and super anxious for some reason too. I really wanted to smoke a cigarette, but John was a good friend, and didn't let me falter. I was upset at the moment, but grateful the next morning! I just made myself an extra protein shake and walked around the apartment a bit. It helped get me through the moment. Today is much better on all counts. :)

Right now we've got the Grammy's on. Something I haven't watched in forever, because, well, music these days isn't anything like it used to be. However, the reason I'm tuned in tonight, is because I am looking forward to seeing The Avett Brothers & Bob Dylan perform. :) Ahhh! Muse just came on to perform! What a great surprise. I LOVE them!

Well, I'm off to start getting ready for work now too. I've been out all week! I have a mud mask on (which feels good... haven't pampered myself in awhile!)... gonna take a shower now. So, not looking forward to going back tomorrow, but... c'est la vie. However, I do have a phone date this evening that I am looking forward to! Hasta mañana...

Voltaire... and I

Some of you may know of Voltaire as the famous French philosopher. Others think of him as the talented poet/writer, responsible for Candide, among others. While still others think of him as somewhat of a quiet revolutionist who questioned the politics and religion of his time. But, did you know, that because of the words he shared, Voltaire was forced to leave Paris several times? He was even imprisoned in the Bastille once! The last time he left Paris, he was exiled for 28 years! During which a great portion of that time, he lived with his mistress, Madame du Châtelet. Is that not a regal name, if ever there was one??? *dreamy sigh* If only my name had an heir of elegance and royalty, like Madame du Poix (Not spelled, "Deproia", Kristen & Scott! LOL). But, I digress... The real knowledge I wanted to share with you is, that on the day he returned, which just so happened to be today, February 11th, in 1778, he was greeted by hundreds of people, celebrating his return. Isn't that something? Unfortunately, as fate would have it, Voltaire would pass away a mere 3 months after his reappearance.

François-Marie Arouet (aka Voltaire):

Not like Voltaire at all, exactly 233 years later, I made my first reappearance into the world, after being exiled (post-surgery) to the apartment since Monday. I was welcomed by several staff members at the 2 NJLA offices, along w/ the pharmacist at Target, the bank teller, and the extremely friendly young man working at Blockbuster. Ah, how good it feels, to feel so good, and walk w/ your head held high! :)

And so, I leave you with this great quote...

"Man is free at the moment he wishes to be." ~ Voltaire (duh)

Upper GI

And I'm not talkin' GI Joe. ;) This morning I went to the hospital for my routine Upper GI exam. Basically, it's an x-ray of your abdomen, to check and make sure everything is in the right place and working correctly. They had me drink a contrast, and can I tell you... it was SO COOL to see it go down my esophagus and into my stomach. I got to see where the Band was and the port as well. It was very quick. John dropped me off at the hospital around 8:15am and Aunt Denise picked me up and dropped me back off at the apt by 10:30am.

Pain a little less today. Everyday I get a little bit better/stronger and pain more tolerable. New pain development today in the upper part of my abdomen below my rib cage to the right. Feels like a pulled muscle... ouch! Oh well. Overall I am doing well and can't complain.

Had a nice surprise today... my Auntie "I" and Uncle Richie stopped by to see me and brought me some very useful things to get me started for the next "Soft Food" phase. It was so nice to have the company and spend the time with them. :) I really am a lucky girl to have such supportive family.

Sharon took the On-Q Pump out for me this evening. That's a huge relief in and of itself! lol Not that it was painful, but it was kind of freaky having tubes on the outside of my abdomen, that went into the center of my abdomen and continuing inside. It was the weirdest sensation while Sharon pulled the tubes out of me, I don't think I can even explain it right in words, but I'll try... it felt like never-ending, long, stiff worms being pulled out from within my abdomen. And it seemed like it took forever to get them out all the way! lol But, I'm tube free now! Yay! :) I also get to look forward to my first real shower tonight. I'm sure everyone around me will be grateful for this too. Ha ha

Ooh, and I enjoyed my first post-op Starbucks skim latte this evening! It was delightful. :)

Post-Op Update

Two days post-op and the pain is subsiding! I still have some of those CO2 pains, and my hernia repair  hurts every time I breathe, but that's getting much better too. I just realized that the other night I did not mention that while the doctors were "in there," they saw I had a hiatal hernia, that they had to repair before putting the Band in. This is located in the diaphragm, hence the pain when I breathe. At least it has become more tolerable today. Sore throat from intubation finally kicked in. That seems to be tolerable too.. :)

I am officially on the protein shake/liquids phase of my post-op transition back to normal foods. I am grateful for this, and the fact that I can have 0% Greek yogurt too! This was key to me being able to get some sleep last night. If I got a half hour of sleep Monday night, I was lucky. Last night at 1am I moved to the couch in pain. Sharon heard me and said, "This is when you take the percocet!" I didn't want to take on an empty stomach and get nauseous (can you imagine the pain from heaving?! Ouch!). So, I took a pill, had some Greek yogurt and turned on the TV. Within half an hour or so (like 2:15am) I was feeling better and sleepy... Next time I woke up it was 5:30am! That was nice. I was able to fall asleep again for another 2-3 hours. Walked around a bit, had a protein shake for breakfast, and then slept some more on and off the rest of the morning. I need to catch up! Had another protein shake around 12:15 for lunch and have been walking around the apartment here and there. They say it helps w/ the healing and dissipating the gas pains. I think I'm going to have some Jell-O or a sugar-free ice pop now to help soothe my throat. I'm finding it hard to keep hydrated with the drinking water for some reason. I'll have to work on that.

I'm hoping the pain will be gone (or almost gone) by the morning. I have to drive to the hospital for an upper GI exam, to ensure the Band is in the proper place and there is no leakage. *fingers crossed*

Oh... my assistant at work called me again today to see how I was doing. She told me that the kids keep asking for me saying, "Where's Miss Valerie?" and that they miss me, as well as the moms. How precious is that?! It was nice to hear and made me feel good. Those kids are adorable, and probably the only thing I enjoy about my job.

Hope everyone is well and staying warm. It is pretty cold out there... I can feel it in the apartment! See ya tomorrow...

P.S. Random side-note... I had to take my tongue ring out for surgery, and have decided to keep it out for good! I know, I know... Big news, right?! LOL I just figure, I'm in my 30's now and maybe it's time to go our separate ways.  It's also caused some damage (chipped my tooth a few weeks ago!) which I could do without. So, farewell dear tongue ring... we've had some good times over the past decade plus. Ha ha However, the nose ring is staying!